Get Your Superman on!
Coaching

Building a Better Mask For a Better You

timokeefe 

What if you can put on whatever role you want so that you feel safer to own that role?

My ex players know that as the “Put your superman on” install I do before every practice.

Such that they take on personal identities larger than whence they started. This talks about the process and the why.

Some of my players may find out why I did some of my weird stuff at practice.

The Downside of Quarantined Living

As communal creatures we crave togetherness.

In fact, I listened to a Doctor say that isolating is maybe worse for us than being outside together seeing others.

So in this time we need to keep busy in our activities. For me, it has been spent non-stop working. I am too busy solving problems to get depressed.

For others, it might be getting reaqainted with that project you kept promising to sort and finish. And finished self promises boosts your integrity and that can help immunity.

The Masking of America

Masks are an interesting subject. Joseph Campbell spoke lots about masks. One of the greatest movie franchises ever was all about masks. Star Wars. When Luke fights his evil father, he cuts his head off and it rolls upon his feet whereby Vadars face is exposed for the first time. And Luke sees a face and it is himself. Years ago my youngest had a terrible speach impediment and it was no surprise that his confidence was a bit bruised about that time in Kindergarden. He was a Spider Man fan and wore a Spidy suit for Halloween and it was a daily show to watch him get his suit on. His voice would lower, and his chest swell as he chased his siter through the house out to the playset in the back. Changing our state is easy, but often it seems that it is not. My son transformed by putting cloth on his body and face. And he was transformed. In these days of protection. I fear that in an already cut off culture. We have gone to a state where nobody wants to even look at you in the market. And that was before shutdown. Now, with face masks it is even easier to hide behind a false shield of protection. Whereby we can pretend for a moment that we are safe. What does that teach ourself? What does that do to our soul? We are subliminally teaching that one another is the enemy. As are we. Masks are transformative because they allow us to be someone else. Like my son to step out of his skin. There is a reason that young adult women love Halloween. They get to pretend to be someone else other than the many roles that they play in everyday life. And thus their behavior will often not match their behavior during their regular life. So the question is why can’t we just step into that role without the big production. WEll maybe because we humans love big productions. We love ceremonies. Lots of folks are trying to celebrate their religion today. And are finding ways to still celebrate without congregating. TO find redemption. Do you really need all that to get redeemed? Well the party helps anchor that feeling in deep. But you can merely change the channel to the redemption channel. IF you are a believer . The deity said you are redeemed. Why all the party and fuss then? Because that is what we do. Now what I find facinating, is how some of us humans go out with church party hat on, then go out at night with a traditional party hat on (if you know what I mean) and then go home to the wife and kids and do the family hat. All masks. Do they integrate or are all of them mostly seperate identities? Back to now and back to quaranteen. We all are developing stay at home habits. Personally I have never been one to dress up for work. I have worked from home for over 20 years. lol I invented this stuff! And I remember all the smart advice was to dress up daily as if you are going to work. Probably decent advice but I do not follow it. MAybe I should. But part of my decision to operate from my home office. Was to flex my independence muscles. And that is more fullfilling to me than dressing up. And I do feel more comfortable and thus can be more productive in my causal dress. With these zoom things taking off of late I might change my habits though lol. So some of the things that you might find interesting to try out while you are waiting for this lunacy of the world to back off to a reasonable crazy . How about try on a few uniforms and masks. Even if pretend. I have done this admonision for years with my players. And depending on the age they immediately play along or they resist it. If I can get them to play along I know I have them and that they will become a team sooner than later. I ask them to put their SUperman on from the first time they enter warmups. This is what I call my mythology install. In fact we start and end with stories of great teammates from the past and why our school or team is so rich with history. But when they put their superman on I mean stand like superman and put your hands in the air like victory, and feel the wind blowing the cape. Now some of the guys will look around at first to see if anyone else is going along with this crazy coach. As a side note the ones that do it and are not worried about what the others are thinking. Are my natural leaders. I then transend this to put on your superman or your favorite football player. I know in modeling great athletes and entrepreneurs there are a few traits they usually share. 1. A binary view of performance. It is either amzingly great or shit. The rainbow and hews and stop and smell the roses are not useful. By the way not a great trait to relate to others in life and why perhaps great entrepreuneurs find themselves often divorced. I think during times like these is when we need to operate from binary. 2. Great athletes often watch a great player tackle, and then put themselves into the body of the player and imagine playing that play as him. I used to study our scouting report in high school and imagine playing each play. I wonder what would had happened if I would had imagined my favorite player Howie Long playing each play and then putting my Howie on? There is a kid I coached long ago who is currently preparing for the NFL draft. A very gifted athlete. But most of the world think that great athletes are born that way. Without a doubt he had a good gene pool. But he also as I discovered thinks uniquely than many others. I asked him how he learned to skateboard at such an early age. He revealed that indeed he put the rider he was mirroring on his body and imagined riding as him. This is not hokus pocus woo woo stuff either. Russian researchers call it the effect. Essentially imagining yourself as your model. Thus like my players you can be anybody. It is similar to an actor I imagine. Many actors are method actors. It is said that Jim Carey did Man on the Moon and never came out of character. And this messes many actors up. Especially when they wear a troubled individuals mask. BUt what if they put on a characters mask that they want to become? An actor to do this will imagine a personality that he or she is mimicking, until they forget that it is mimickery, it is indeed them. So during this lockdown what is it that you want to be after? Who demonstrates that? Can you put on their mask for a bit? HEre is another thing. If you are not used to working from home. You might have a home gait. A Home walk that is unique to your business walk or stature. Naturally. But remind yourself of how your business walk works. And what if you practiced a walk how your model person walks. And put her or him onto you. I was motivated by this last night as I was playing with my wife. We have a pseudo personality that we play fun jokes as to each other. Totally corny and cheezy. They are though indeed masks. And I like an actor have developedm y character so as to get her to laugh and what I say. Or more importantly how I say it. If I was to attempt to do that from the regular Tim mask, then I might not have the resources of this mask of my own making to say something corny in the right way to make Julie laugh. And that is the point. During this time become someone else to become the you that you want and your family needs you to be. https://www.apa.org/monitor/mar02/pretend https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/laugh-your-way-well-being/201510/the-masks-we-wear Being a fake is not the purpose of this post. Taking on traits that you admire is the purpose.

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